....more than a friend....?? //

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  Topic Started By:  helsbels    On:  Mon 25th July, 2005 at 16:56
WTFH
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 14,398
Surrey
#62  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 09:23
Ah, "Fun Bobby" Syndrome.

So, is it a case that he needs a couple of drinks to relax when he's with you, or that you need a couple of drinks to make a move?
I post, therefore I am

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*~Larry~*
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,530
Bern, Switzerland
#64  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 09:39
How about you talk to him about it instead?

If you are that good friends, you trust each other, and your at the start or thinking of starting a relationship, then shouldn't you be able to tell/ask/say anything to him and get an honest response?

It seems to me that it's more of a communication thing than anything else.
EVERY TIME GRIFF GETS IN HIS HOT TUB - GOD KILLS A KITTEN.

TRUE STORY.
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user206
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 1,475
#65  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 10:41

Originally posted by *~Larry~*

How about you talk to him[/b:cad94f6950] about it instead?

Good god don't do [b:cad94f6950]that
! Worst thing you could possibbly do is talk to him about it.

I say just make sure you're pissed all the time. Or rather make sure he's pissed all the time. If he wont play ball (i'm sure he will though) you may need to spike his drinks....
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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#66  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:29

Originally posted by moj


So as usual the man has to do all the work? Maybe he finds

Originally posted by

confidence and 'knowing what you want'

attractive? If so I think you're in trouble
indeed, as now i don't really know wot i want!
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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#67  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:33

Originally posted by Kenzie

Hels,
Quit while you're ahead.[/quote:d88420887f]
and
[quote:d88420887f="dino"]If it only works when you're pissed, then it's a non-starter. I'd bin it before it gets really awkward.


mmm thats kinda the way i was leaning
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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#68  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:35

Originally posted by WTFH

Ah, "Fun Bobby" Syndrome.

So, is it a case that he needs a couple of drinks to relax when he's with you, or that you need a couple of drinks to make a move?

either way not good is it??
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WTFH
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 14,398
Surrey
#69  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:42

Originally posted by helsbels

Originally posted by WTFH

Ah, "Fun Bobby" Syndrome.

So, is it a case that he needs a couple of drinks to relax when he's with you, or that you need a couple of drinks to make a move?

either way not good is it??

Nope. Talk to him about it some time when you are both sober.
I post, therefore I am

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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#70  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:49

Originally posted by *~Larry~*

How about you talk to him about it instead?

If you are that good friends, you trust each other, and your at the start or thinking of starting a relationship, then shouldn't you be able to tell/ask/say anything to him and get an honest response?

It seems to me that it's more of a communication thing than anything else.

interesting...........behave like a grown up eh?! hadn't thought of that!!
we had a bit of a chat the other night (pre-breaking finger) and i beleive it went something like this

him "this ain't gonna work is it?"
me "is that really what you think?"
him "*odd pause*"
me "well everything seems fine after a few drinks its just when you're sober it all seems a bit awkward"
him "maybe we should just leave it"
me being stubborn knowing he's just sayin that coz he thinks thats what i wanna hear. mind games. hate them. "fine, whatever, if thats really what you want" so i headed for bar and did lots of shots.

not much memory after that but i woke up with him in my bed so must have made up!! and on examining sent messages, recieved calls etc it seems he called alot too.

i get the feeling someones gonna suggest trying this again. sober.
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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#71  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 13:53

Originally posted by gadget

Originally posted by *~Larry~*

How about you talk to him[/b:bef5e48b10] about it instead?

Good god don't do [b:bef5e48b10]that
! Worst thing you could possibbly do is talk to him about it.

I say just make sure you're pissed all the time. Or rather make sure he's pissed all the time. If he wont play ball (i'm sure he will though) you may need to spike his drinks....

this doesn't sound good coz as a group we seem to have decided that the binge drinking is getting dangerous (in a month breaking my finger, nearly getting impailled on a spikey fence and too many cuts and bruises to count) so gonna start 'behaving like grown ups' ....... just til i get back to the alps!!!
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user206
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 1,475
#72  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 17:28

Originally posted by helsbels

i get the feeling someones gonna suggest trying this again. sober.

try it again sober(ish) or at least take along some kind of recording device (or assign a somone to take minutes) so that you know what was said in the morning and have a record of how people made it into your boudoir
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moj
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 3,698
#73  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 19:40

Originally posted by gadget

have a record of how people made it into your boudoir

I suggest a sort of guest book, with: name, gender, time, date and a space for comments or suggestions.

Originally posted by toiletduck

Alright, I'd like to say that all eople with 3 letter forum names beginning with M, who've been heli skiing in NZ are twats with the social skills of a dead horse and should probably be banned from the internet in general, as well as sharp objects.
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mista
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 12,998
The sticks
#74  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 19:46

Originally posted by moj

Originally posted by gadget

have a record of how people made it into your boudoir

I suggest a sort of guest book, with: name, gender, time, date and a space for comments or suggestions.

If you want you could post the logbook info here on natives after every conquest - I'm sure you would reveive lots of constructive feedback...
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mista
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 12,998
The sticks
#75  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 20:02
Reading back throught the thread it looks like a sober discussion is most likely going to lead to you going back to being friends...

However, this seems to be the way you are leaning anyway...

You have had a bit of fun, but at the moment it doesnt really seem to be heading towards anything more serious.

If you are not so happy with the current "fcuk buddy" situation then it would be best you do as above. Perhaps he will miss what you had and commit more or perhaps he wont - either way you will be out of the current situation...

If you are happy with the current "fcuk buddy" situation then get on with it...
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mista
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 12,998
The sticks
#77  Re: ....more than a friend....??  10 Aug '05 at 20:14

Originally posted by Dinosaur

Originally posted by

him "maybe we should just leave it"

That's not mind games, it's a plain statement of preference. He isn't interested - leave it.

Yes indeed...

She seems to think that us guys act like you women...
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helsbels
Member Since: 2004
Posts: 2,044
Weston-super-Mare, (Winter 04/05- Lapland then Morzine - Esprit.)
#79  Re: ....more than a friend....??  11 Aug '05 at 09:46

Originally posted by mista


If you are happy with the current "fcuk buddy" situation then get on with it...
normally very happy with fcuk buddy situations, no commitment is good when running off the the alps. just doesn't feel right i suppose, all my previous f^%k buddys have been just as keen when sober. in danger of feeling like a ten to two girl. (do u know what i mean by that?)
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