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 Let's
face it: who really, honestly, wants to work during
their season? If you're seriously into your boarding/skiing,
the last thing you want when it's a great powder day
is to be rudely interrupted by having to go to work!
So, if you can't shake
the cravings for the white stuff, there is only one
real option: Commit to the cause, swear allegiance to
the credit card, devote your soul to powder, sell everything
and BECOME A BUM.
The Ultimate Ski Bum Experience:
Be Lucky
Rock up at the start of the season and get a cheap deal
on a great flat in the centre of resort. Alternatively,
meet a wealthy chalet owner and get paid to house-sit
while he's not there (honest, it happened to a friend
of mine). Make good use of his top of the range 4x4
(you need to keep cars running or they freeze up, right?)
and become the most popular bum in town.
Make Friends with Chalet Staff
Make friends with all the chalet girls/boys (helps if
you have that irresistible cheeky face and naughty twinkle
in your eye). Flirt outrageously, while never exercising
favouritism and you will have the perfect balance of
unlimited free food and sex. Easy.
 Make
Friends with Bar Staff
Make good friends with bar owners/staff and get
all your drinks for free. In return, entertain them
with your great wit and impressive tales of mountain
madness. Occasionally help out by DJing/doing promotions
on special nights, in return for more free drinks.
Have a Face that Fits
Happen to look exactly like the first worker to get
sent home with an injury and 'borrow' their season lift
pass. Alternatively, make friends with a ski instructor/pisteur,
who lets you have his/her old uniform so you don't even
need to bother with queuing for lifts (seriously, another
friend pulled this one off for a whole season).
Coin it...
Offer your services around resort as freelance bar person
/ photographer / driver and negotiate lucrative contracts
to fit in with your hectic schedule of boarding/skiing,
partying and sleeping. Alternatively, get spotted by
a Salomon/Burton scout who spies your potential and
pays you to ride/travel/live the life. End up coming
home with more money that you started with.
OK - far fetched, but it can happen. The sad truth is
though that for every successful season bummed, most
fail miserably in their quest for ultimate snow nirvana.
Reality Bites:
Nowhere to Live
Rock up only to find that you're 6 months too late
and all the accommodation went in August. Beg and plead
a space on someone's floor for a few nights. Be grateful
for your sleeping bag and try not to listen to your
kind host 'entertaining' their latest conquest three
inches from your head. Get kicked out on Christmas Eve,
after you're caught with your tongue 'accidentally'
down said conquest's throat, forcing you to blow half
your budget paying tourist rates for a bed over Christmas
and New Year. Go home at the end of January when your
money runs out.
 Nothing
to Eat
Discover that most new chalet staff 'can't cook, won't
cook' and spend a fortune on burgers to stave off imminent
starvation. Spend your first few weeks feeling too cold,
hungry, hungover and tired to go up the mountain. Contract
flu as a result of poor living conditions and spend
£50 on antibiotics. Remember you forgot about
travel insurance.
Spend all your Money
Show your commitment to friendship with (the bank of)
bar owners by investing all your money with them. Entertain
them with drunken antics and your best party tricks,
only to have them laugh in your face when you ask about
possible jobs. 'Reshposhible, moi?! Coursh I am.' Blame
beer monster for lack of notes in your wallet and report
the theft to the police. Ring home for emergency funds.
 Have
a Face that Fits (but not know it)
Spend £400 on your season lift pass, only to find
out two days later that the guy/girl who looked exactly
like you has broken his leg and is going home. Try (and
fail) to resell your lift pass to the lift pass office.
Earn a Crust (literally)
Offer your services around resort as freelance bar person/photographer/driver.
After three weeks of 'Je cherche du travail', feel lucky when you're
offered a trial day's pot washing at £1.50/hour. Cherish the
£10 you've made for 6 hours work, and do not resent the fact
that you were scrubbing cheese (aka cement) off saucepans while
all your mates were out enjoying the first big dump of the season.
OK - exaggerated perhaps, but not so far from reality. Bumming
a season is fun but hard work, and by no means guaranteed to succeed.
But that doesn't stop people from needing their snow fix. So if
you are determined not to work why not try Planet Subzero, who offer
affordable seasonal accommodation to make not working a more realistic
option.
There's no cramming 10 to a room in mouldy apartment blocks five
miles out of town either. They are based in the freeride and snowboard
centre of Les Arcs where you can improve your skills, travel to
loads of other resorts, and even get breakfast! For more information
visit www.planetsubzero.com
or call 07905 097087.
[Article written by Steph
Lightfoot from Planet
SubZero]
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